Episode 27 of the Fuel the Fire Podcast hosted by Shanon Safi, RD, LDN.
In this episode, Shanon sits down with Allie O’Neil, a certified coach specializing in hypnotherapy. Together, they discuss how Allie found her passion and embarked on her amazing healing journey aided by hypnosis. Listen to learn more about how you can benefit from tapping into your subconscious.
In this episode: Meet Allie O’Neil: What lead her from teaching to coaching and the challenges in-between (03:20) What led Allie to seek Hypnotherapy and all the benefits she experienced first-hand (17:17) Embracing the power of alternative therapy (26:01) How to allow yourself to open up to your subconscious (36:01) Special gift for our listeners (52:54)
Use code fuelthefire to try a free, guided body appreciation hypnotherapy
This whole thing, like you're always going to deal with it, so let's manage your symptoms. Why don't we challenge those thoughts? And that's where I think hypnosis is so beautiful. You're giving people power back. I'm not doing anything. You're doing it yourself. You are bringing yourself home to you.
Hello. Welcome to the Fuel Fire Soul podcast with your host, Shannon Safi. This year, we're going to be having so many amazing, beautiful guests on this show. I'm really excited to get to share the magic of all the different people that I am so fortunate and grateful to come into contact with during this lifetime.
Our first guest of the year, Allie O'Neill, is someone that I went through a program called QCA, ran by Ashley Gordon. We went through this program together to become coaches, certified hypnotherapists, and so many other different healing modalities that really help. Elevate the coaching experience. If you're intrigued by any of the different modalities that we discussed during this episode, I highly encourage you to check out my group coaching programs or consider working one on one with me.
This is going to save you so much time and energy, like literally years of healing can happen in such a rapid period when you tap into these different modalities. I'm so excited to be able to offer those to you and I'm really happy that I got to have this conversation with Allie and share it with you so that you can really start to begin to understand the magic that so many of these tools are.
I hope you're as excited as I am. I know I said excited 10 times already, but truthfully that is how I'm feeling because this message, everything that we discuss is so great. It is gold. So, buckle up and we are going to get hello, welcome to another episode of the Fuel Fire Soul Podcast. I am so excited today because we have a special guest.
We haven't had a guest on for a while, and today I have the honor of having Allie with us, who is a certified hypnotherapist. And Allie and I go back to last summer when we met in a program called QCA, where we were both getting certified in various things from group coaching, individual coaching, hypnotherapy, Reiki, all these fun, different activities that we know both have underneath our belt.
And yeah, I'm so excited to have her on here because she has just. It's been such a light and I got to work with her one on one during the program. She was so helpful to me in my journey and to have her on here and to share with you some of her magic. I think you guys are going to love it. And so yeah, let's jump into it.
Oh, thank you so much for having me and for that nice introduction. Yeah, for real. I really feel like, especially when everyone in the group was kind of going through a different phase and really trying to step into a new role, like it was really great to have someone right there to kind of support you through that.
And I think it makes you a better coach. Like, I always say don't have a coach who doesn't also have a coach because that really helps you understand the process and grow even more. So, I loved it. Yeah, totally agree. So yeah, tell the audience a little bit about yourself, and we'll start with outside of your career so they can get to know, like, the alley.
Cool, so, yeah, I am 29 years old, almost 30 in a few months and honestly, I'm like really excited to turn 30. I think I might be the minority when I say that, but I'm like, I cannot wait for that, like, 3 0. I just feel like it's gonna be the best, I don't know. My 20s have been a lot of healing and growth and lessons, and I feel like 30s is when you get to just, like, live.
Like, you know who you are, you get to just tap into it. The last few years, I really dove in to healing, transforming, all of that stuff, reconnecting with my passions. Especially with nature, I love being outside, going for hikes, just sitting at the beach, watching the sunset. Although I live in New Hampshire where the sunset is not over the water but I was lucky enough to live in Florida for a little bit where I got to soak up all the sunsets on the beach.
I have three dogs who are a little crazy and we might get to hear, but hopefully they'll be quiet during this, but and I also nanny. So I'm really just getting to live out my passions of being with kids. being in nature, snuggling my dogs all the time, and really getting to help people, which I'm sure we'll dive into.
I love that. I think it's so cool because you really kind of dip into so many different things that I feel that, you know, everything kind of goes together in a sense where What you do outside of your career somehow kind of bleeds into who you are as a person and everything, which makes entrepreneurship so cool.
How did you get into nannying? Tell me more about that. Yeah, so my nannying journey, it's so funny because it actually started with entrepreneurship. So, I went to school to become a teacher. I knew I wanted to teach my whole life. Like it was just a no brainer. Started teaching, actually started going to grad school.
And at the time, I was teaching at this school that really just was not a great fit for me. I started having anxiety, I was like crying before going into my classroom. It was rough. And while in grad school, an opportunity presented itself to do part time nannying for this family. And I was really into network marketing at the time.
And my network marketing business had completely taken off where I was making almost double my teaching salary. So, I was like, okay, if I can leave this school, focus on grad school, still get to work with kids and have an income. Of course, I'm going to do that. And then one thing kind of led to another.
And once I got a taste of nannying, I was like, I will never step foot back in a classroom again. And I haven't. Wow. Yeah, I actually had no idea that you taught before. That's so, that's like so interesting to me. Yep. Preschool and first grade. Kids at that age, especially when you have a larger group, it's a lot of energy to corral and get them to focus on tasks at hand.
How long ago was that? I want to say 2016 to 2018. All my years have started to blur together at this point, where I'm just like, it was a while ago and I actually loved preschool. That was my favorite. It was just the school when I started teaching first grade, I guess. It was like a co teacher scenario.
The person I was with, we had totally different philosophies on teaching. It just wasn't a great match. And the area that I was teaching in was just like a really rough area. And I just, didn't have. Like, I have so much love for teachers and what they do and what they go through, and especially teachers that work in these lower income areas because there's a whole another level that people don't realize.
I was having students coming in with their shoes duct taped together. Or is the middle of winter and all they had was a sweatshirt. So, I'm giving them my jacket for recess. So like, you can't be out here in just a sweatshirt. And I have people being like, you can't do that. And it was kind of in that moment where I'm like, why, like, why can't you help them all?
Why are you telling me to harden my heart? Right. And so that was kind of also a turning point when I just realized like, my mission is so much greater than just the classroom. I didn't realize what that meant at the time, but looking back I'm like, wow, that really was a turning point for me to allow myself to say, no, I don't agree with what you're saying and I'm gonna challenge that.
Wow. Yeah, I think just hearing that. Yeah, like, I'm like, wow, yeah, because you have that moment when you're in these more typical settings and when you have that, like, entrepreneurial spirit deep in your heart, those are the moments that kind of make you really want to propel. It's almost where you hit this point where you're like there is more to life than this.
Like, this can't be the way to helping people expand or to show them love or to give them some sense of empowerment or, like, feeling good. And you're like, wow, these, yeah, again, these traditional scenarios that were put into with a lot of rules and regulations, I'm thinking sometimes, Hinder or block you from sharing your message in the way that you want to, and truly living out your purpose.
Yeah, totally. And at that time of my life, I was very much ado as I'm told type of person, and it was just one of those things where I'm like, something just doesn't feel right about this. And then it was finally listening and just being presented with opportunities and being open to new opportunities that it just really started to snowball.
And again, one thing led to another. I'm like, wow, looking back, if this one thing didn't happen, like, would I be where I am today? And it just makes you have so much gratitude for those moments, even though they weren't great. They didn't feel great while you were in them. If they didn't happen, would you be where you are today?
I think every entrepreneur also has a similar point where they have that moment of, like, this could be better and I want to start being open to more possibility. So, I can definitely relate to that. I really only lasted like a year in a job before I decided to start Fuel and I also felt like it was not a great scenario, which really further pushed me into wanting to just dive in and take the leap and do what I felt in my heart was what I was meant to do and how I was meant to connect with people and live out my career and my passion and my purpose.
Yeah, and it's the people that are willing to step out and say, Hey. Hey. We can do things differently, you know, it's one thing to sit around and be like, you know, I don't really agree with the way that society is doing this or approaching this or talks about this, but it's another to say, well, what am I going to do about it?
How can I start to create that change? How can I speak on this? And it's intimidating. It's scary to step out and speak against the norm. But it's How else can we expect change to happen if we're not willing to do that? I love that! So true! Did you face any adversity when you wanted to make that switch?
From teaching to nannying? Yeah, like kind a saying like, Okay, I'm gonna leave my teaching career, pursue nannying, and even with that next level, when you wanted to step into coaching. Luckily, I am surrounded by so much love and support. I remember going to my parents crying because that's when I decided I was going to withdraw from grad school.
So, I was like, why rack up more debt if I know I never want to teach again? And I'm crying. And they're like, what is wrong? Like, what do you need to tell us? And I was like, I'm withdrawing from grad school. And they literally laughed at me. They're like, that's why you're crying? Are you serious? I'm like, well, I just don't want you to be disappointed in me.
And I'm so sorry. But they're like, Allie, this is your life. You need to do what makes you happy. And then I'm crying. Cause I'm like, wait, what? Like, you're not mad at me? And even, when I decided, then I decided to move to Florida, I'm originally from Massachusetts, and the family I was nannying for at the time, I had, they were my hardest goodbye.
Like, I'm crying telling her, like, we're gonna move to Florida because those kids were my life. And even that, I was met with so much love and support. She's like, you know, you, it makes me sad to see that you're leaving and that you decide that you don't want to teach because I know what an impact you make on children.
But You have to do what makes you happy. And then it was the same thing when I went full time with my network marketing business. I was like, so afraid of like the stigma and what are people going to think of me? And the people closest to me, they were like, I don't really get it. But if you enjoy it, then like, go for it.
They're like, cool, whatever. And then when I wanted to kind of step away from my network marketing business and step into coaching, even everyone on my team was like, Ally, you're meant for this. I'm like, wait, you're not mad at me? They're like, no, we're so proud of you. I was like, oh. And so I know that I, I'm very blessed to be able to say that I have really only been met with love and support for all of the transitional phases in my life because I know unfortunately that's not the norm. And so, I am so grateful for the support system that I have in my life. True. Having a good support system makes a huge.
Difference in all of this. And even, I do feel like it's common in women where we just take on this, like, responsibility to continue to just like, okay, we started this role, you build a connection with the people around there, you become really invested. And we fear leaving that, or fear leaving a job, or a situation, or even relationships.
And when we finally do, I think a lot of people tend to be almost surprised with the support, or how okay it actually is, because we create this story in our head that we're going to be, like, punished, or people are going to hate us. And yeah, more often than not, that just keeps us stuck rather than letting us finally feel free to move on and do the thing that we're meant for.
And it's funny, like, even you said, people looked at you and they were like, dude, I always knew. Like, I always knew you were going to go off and do a thing. And here you are, and you're like, wait, what? You saw that in me? You like, like, I didn't even see that in me until now. Yeah. It was so funny because everyone was like, it's about time.
And I was like, wait, what? And they're just like. Dude, like, this is literally your calling, and I was like, oh, I mean, I knew that, but I think I was afraid to actually claim that, and it's exactly that. We start creating all these stories of how is this going to affect everyone else? How are they going to respond?
How are they going to feel about it? And... It took me two years. Like, coaching was on my heart over two years ago, and I kept pushing it off, until finally, it was like the universe was like, dude, enough is enough. Let's go. And I hit this kind of, I don't want to say a breaking point, but it's just this pivotal moment where I was like, okay, I'm actually faced with a decision here.
Like, I can go into coaching, or I can just. Go ham with my business. And I knew that I didn't feel aligned with my business anymore. And I really felt pulled towards coaching. So, I was like, okay, this is my time. But it took me so long because I was putting everyone else's opinions or needs or.
perceptions in front of my own. And so even just stepping into finally claiming, like, I'm doing this because this is what I want to do. You can support me or not, but I'm going to do it. And it was so freeing. And I think in that way is also why I was met with so much love and support because I was like, regardless of what you have to say to me, I know what I'm meant to do and this is it.
So, take it or leave it. And because I took all that pressure off, everyone was just like, of course, like, why wouldn't I support you? If this is what you want to do, it’s your life. Go ahead and do it. That's amazing. I'm really happy that you had that experience and it like kind of transitions a little bit into your career because I feel like what you do now with the hypnotherapy kind of was inspired by your personal experience.
Yeah, my journey with hypnotherapy is an interesting one. it Actually started two summers ago now. I'm like, again, the years really just, I feel like the last few years have just flown by that. I'm like, wait, that was two years ago? That feels like it was six months ago. But I was really struggling with pelvic floor dysfunction.
It's called vaginismus. I had struggled with it for 12 years. years. I had gone to doctor after doctor, and they basically were just like, you're fine, suck it up, get over it, drink a glass of wine, like, relax, like, you just need to relax. And I just felt so defeated. And I was like, why the heck is this happening to me?
Like, you know, when it almost felt like my body was betraying me. And if you don't know what vaginismus is, it's essentially like involuntary muscle spasms of your pelvic floor. And so, with that, it can be really painful penetration, like using tampons, like things like that. And so, it was really affecting me because, again, like, my whole life, I have known I'm meant to, like, help people and I'm meant to be a mom.
And it felt like vaginismus was taking motherhood away from me because of how painful any sort of penetration was. And I was like, I'm getting older. Like, I was just having this, like, huge existential crisis of, like, why me? Why is this happening? And in therapy, it was coming up a lot, and we were like, do I have repressed memories?
Like, did something happen to me? Like, why does my body respond so, like, I don't want to say aggressively, but just, like, so intensely to minimal situations? And so, I was like, I don't know. Like, how do you find the answer to this? Like, how do you know if something happened if you don't remember it? Like, what?
And so that's, I already knew about the subconscious. I also went to college for psychology. So, I had some background and I was just online and I came across hypnotherapy and I was like, yo, they can tap into my memory. Like, they can tell me if something happened. And so, I found someone in my area. And she specifically said that she did not work with sexual trauma.
But I emailed her anyways, and I was like, here this is what's happening. I know you said this, but I don't actually know if I have sexual trauma. So, like, can you help me? And she was the sweetest woman. She was like, I would be honored to help you on this journey. So... I met her, had no idea what hypnosis actually was.
Like, a lot of people you see, like, stage hypnosis, where people are doing crazy things, or like, in movies, where it's like, they start seeing this spiral, and they're like, zoning out, and have no memory of anything. So, I'm like, what the heck am I actually getting myself into? And she explained the whole process to me.
It was... Very different than what I was expecting, and what I got out of it was so much more different than I was expecting, because You basically are just like in a form of meditation and they just ask you these questions and the way that she did it was actually yes or no questions and your pinky or your pointer finger would go up depending if it was a yes or a no.
It was wild because I was not moving my fingers and they were just moving and I'm like, what the heck is happening? Like, that is wild. And that's when I was like, this shit is real. My subconscious is speaking to me in a way that, like, I wasn't even aware of, and then I was really hoping that, like, this sounds messed up, I was hoping this, like, traumatic thing would come up, because it would give me answers.
It would explain what was happening. And it didn't. That did not happen. What happened was I saw, like, my younger self, like, my three-year-old self, just in this, like, blackness. I don't know if that's because Stranger Things was a big thing then, and what's her name, eleven would, like, go into that, like, blackness, and, like, that's what it felt like.
And I just saw her so, like, sad. and alone and, like, shameful. And it was just, like, all of these messages coming in from society, from church, from, you know, people in my life about all of this messaging about how, like, women shouldn't be sexual and it's horrible and you're gonna go to hell and you're not worthy of love and it makes you dirty and just, like, all of these different things.
And I was, like, Holy smokes, like, I had no idea how much that was impacting me, and like, how much, like, actual disgust I had towards my body. And I just start crying, like, this is so sad, that, how much that has impacted me from such an early age. And so, I come out of it, and it was great, we, I gained, like, all this awareness, and that just, like, really, created this awareness of how much our subconscious is actually dictating our lives and how much we're holding on to that.
We have no idea what's actually going on in our day-to-day life. Like, we're getting triggered by things. We're making meaning of things. We're absorbing things. that we don't even know, and then we're just going through our day to day lives, like, why is this happening to me? Like, what is going on? Like, why do I feel this way?
And it's because there's so much going on beneath the surface and all this messaging that we've created to become our truth, and we've never been challenged to say, like, is that actually true? Like, are our beliefs true? Whose voice is that? Is that even me? And through hypnosis, I was then exposed to it again when I did a course with Manifestation Babe.
She had hypnosis recordings and then they had a coach that was a hypnotherapist. So, I've just like really deep dove and it really brought me back to myself. It brought me back to like, who am I at my core outside of what other people told me to believe, outside of what society tells me I should be, outside of.
Expectations and all of this stuff like who am I and who do I want to be and how do I want to show up and how do I want to feel and all of these things and it was just hard like I will never say that it's this easy beautiful flowy thing like it's really hard to go back and be like oh wow like that actually hurt and I'm still holding on to that hurt.
But then, getting to actually release that, release the resentment, release the anger, and come out on the other side and be like, wow, I'm finally at peace with that. And, just to like, give it a little happy ending from what I started with, through hypnosis, and also working with a professional pelvic floor physical therapist, I was actually able to overcome my vaginismus in only seven months.
Which is... Insane. Something that I struggled with 12 years that doctors basically told me, like, sucks to suck. And then I finally had someone that was willing to listen and say like, Hey, you're not alone. You can get through this. And also bringing in the subconscious programming and rewiring and realizing that my body is beautiful and it's this temple and I get to nourish it and care for it and love it and that doesn't make me dirty or bad or what does bad even mean?
And really bringing those two together, like body, mind, soul. In seven months, my life literally completely transformed, not just with my pelvic floor, but like, internally, mentally, emotionally, physically, like, it's been a freaking journey and it's wild to think that it literally all started with that desperation and going to that hypnosis session.
Wow, that goes like even deeper than I anticipated, which I think is really beautiful. Thank you for sharing all of that. Yeah, I, kind of what you said, I think it's, there's just so many thoughts that I had to all, so many different things that you've said, but I said a lot, so I loved it. I was like, on the edge of my seat, I'm like, oh yeah, tell me more about this.
Yeah, I think. With doctors, I find that happens where, in Western medicine, I feel that there is a gap with that connection between, like, our emotional body, our spiritual body, and, like, our physical body. I've had a lot of clients that had similar experiences where doctors will dismiss them, or a doctor just, like, won't even bring up these plausible connections of why things might be happening to people.
I can think of one client specifically where she had all these terrible stomach issues. She would like throw up frequently, all sorts of things, and doctors would just be like, yeah, here's some like antacids. You just go figure this out. And you know, there's no real like, okay, well, let's really dig down into the root of this.
And it's a lot of just pushing almost Band Aid, like, yeah, just try to stick a Band Aid on a gaping wound where this is like so much deeper and this Band Aid really isn't solving the issue. It's just kind of saying like, hey, just deal with this problem. And they make it seem as if like, this is just a card you were dealt and there's nothing that you can do about it.
Exactly. And I have found that in multiple things. And for example, I love therapy. I go to therapy. It has helped me so much. However, even in the mental health field, it's this whole thing like, oh, it's a card you were dealt. Like you're always going to deal with it, so let's manage your symptoms. And diving into the world of hypnosis, I'm like, Yo, you don't have to manage.
You can heal that. You don't have to live that way. You don't have to accept the quote unquote cards you were dealt because so, like, you weren't born depressed, for example. You weren't. No baby comes out Already depressed. Where is that stemming from? Where is that coming from? And so much research is even showing if you ever read the body keeps the score that book transformative and it just talks about like a lot of this is actually passed down through generations.
Everyone I feel like talks about generational trauma. It's almost like a buzzword at this point. But that doesn't mean that You're, it's like detrimental. Like, it doesn't mean this is the end all be all. It doesn't mean you don't have a fighting chance. It doesn't mean that you can't overcome it. It just means maybe it's a, you have a little bit more to work through than someone else, but not hope is lost.
And just seeing my friends who have struggled with mental health and how many professionals have told them, like, you're always going to be this way. It's like, why? Like, why don't we challenge those thoughts? And it's wild to me that there's literally research out there that shows that's not true, but I've also seen that practices tend to be about 12 years behind the research.
It's like you have these people, there's research out there, but you also have these people not actively seeking the research and giving this outdated information, and all of these people are being disempowered. And that's where I think hypnosis is so beautiful, you're giving people the power back, because I'm not doing anything, I'm guiding you, I'm talking to you, but you're doing the work, you're doing it yourself, you are bringing yourself home to you.
I'm just a facilitator. And I think that's where it's the most empowering thing, because you can do self-hypnosis. You don't even need someone. Of course, it can be beneficial to have someone walk you through it, especially in the beginning. But it's one of those things where I just think hypnosis is so empowering because you are healing yourself.
You're giving yourself that internal validation. You're giving yourself that love. You're giving yourself the compassion. You're not seeking someone else to do it for you. You're not looking for anything outside of yourself because everything you need is already within you. It's just learning how to tap into that.
That was so. beautiful. I got chills as you were saying that. Yeah, it's the concept of, like, getting your power back. I really love that. And even with the generational trauma, like, so much of what you said, I'm like, yeah, that's stuff that in my personal life I've been also trying to work through because it's so many things that I think initially we don't realize that these things are affecting us because we're not taught to notice that there is a connection between that and that there's an avenue that you can actually pull yourself out of these patterns, out of these blocks, and to have something that allows you to do that.
I mean, it’s, like, I think there's a lot of stigmas around hypnotherapy. Like, I know initially when we were getting certified, I even felt like Oh, I'm not gonna tell people I'm certified in hypnotherapy. Like, they're gonna think I'm crazy. I can't just, you know, I, like, they're gonna think that I'm, like, losing my mind going from being a dietician to, like, someone that does hypnotherapy on people.
And... Once I started just to kind of learn more about it and release the stigma and actually understand what it is and what this process looks like, it's like, wow, okay, I can actually let myself sink into this and experience the benefits of this really powerful subconscious tool that gives you information that, like you said, like, it could have taken years, and sometimes people go through an entire lifetime never knowing some of these subconscious thoughts and patterns or things that they might have repressed.
Exactly. And it’s so funny because you notice I, it's, I have found even generationally like who you're talking to and how they respond. So, like our generation, I feel like they're just like, Oh, interesting. Tell me more. But I was talking to my Nana the other day. And she's like, Oh, do you still, you know, do that funny because with my network marketing business, she goes, do you still do that computer business?
And I was like, you know what she’s like, like selling. I was like, I didn't even use a computer, but she just like, doesn't understand the concept. So it made me laugh. And I was like, oh, no I actually do hypnotherapy now in her face. Like, I wish everyone could have just seen her face. She looked. so confused and was trying so hard to hide the, like, what you're doing.
And I'm like, yeah. And like healing and subconscious and my Nana is extremely Catholic. And so even that just brings in a whole nother layer of like, what is this woo stuff that you're doing? And I didn't go into the depths of it, but I was kind of being very playful because I knew how she would respond.
Even that I was surprised because she took a second and said, well, if you enjoy it, then that's what matters. And then we just ended the conversation, but then you have, you know, people like my mom's age where she's like, yeah, I don't really like know that much about it. I'm intrigued. And luckily, my mom is also very into like mind, body, the spiritual, more spiritual side.
And it's actually amazing to see how many people have experienced hypnotherapy or heard of it in the sense of oh, I've heard it helps with weight loss or to stop smoking or things like that. And I'm like, yeah, but let me tell you, that doesn't even scratch the surface of the potential with hypnosis. But it is interesting to see it.
the way people respond. And at first, I felt kind of weird because, again, like, I grew up religious and now I'm more I just say spiritual. Like, I'm just so open minded to, like, anything and everything. So, it's just interesting to see people that are tell me more. Or they're like, oh, like, people either lean in or lean out.
And I'm like, yes, let me tell you about this. Because I'm sure you have this, like, stigma or. Not like experience with it, but again, like the movies or the stage hypnosis makes people a little intimidated by it. I'm like, you've probably been hypnotized today without even realizing it. Like everyone, almost everyone has actually experienced hypnosis.
They just didn't know that they were being hypnotized. Yeah, that's so true. As we were learning some of the phrases that actually enter or get a person to enter trans, yeah, it's like really casual wording. So, yeah, it's something that people almost fear, but the reality of it is So many times your subconscious has been imprinted, and it, yeah, it happens on a daily basis, and most people don't realize that it's happening.
And once you become conscious of that, and you start to notice it, and I see it in so many little things, like, especially in media, and I'm like, wow. Oh, yeah. You know, and it's like, you sound like the crazy one when you're like, oh my gosh, this is like, hypnotic language, like, oh, these things actually Imprint on you and once you become a lot more aware of it, you're just like, yeah, you start to see all the places that it pops up and oh, yeah, one thing.
So, kind of with what you were saying when someone has. Almost like a resistance to it, and maybe it's not, maybe resistance is not the right word, but like, for example, I had a client who was having trouble letting themselves tap into their intuition and their subconscious. They were kind of resisting, like, unconsciously resisting.
the process, because they didn't want to trust what was coming up. Like, something would come up and they'd be like, they would like, hold back and like, you know, almost fight themselves. When you have that happen, what would you say it is that you can do to kind of help a person Relax, allow the process to happen, and not let any of these preconceived notions block them.
Or again, if it's just like their first time ever allowing someone to enter their subconscious like that, consciously, like consciously consenting to that subconscious tapping into yeah, how do you kind of help people get past that? Yeah, so there's a few different ways, and of course, it's going to depend on the person.
Something that is really important is making sure that the person is educated and reassured, that this isn't brainwashing, this isn't me mind controlling. And I love walking people through a really short hypnosis. It's... Maybe less than five minutes. And it just shows them the power of the mind body connection and that the body will do what the mind tells them to.
It just shows them like, hey, how was that? And they're like, oh, that felt so different than I was expecting. Like, I just felt like I was in a meditation. Like I just felt so relaxed and present and I was really surprised. I'm like. That, you were just hypnotized. Like, that was hypnosis. And I also love to give different examples.
So, for example, have you ever been lost in a good book? Like, have you ever been reading that the whole world around you just disappear and this book becomes your reality? It's almost like you are in the book. That's hypnosis. That is a form of hypnosis. You are in trance, and just realizing how often we're actually in a state of hypnosis, which is really just a state of relaxation, right?
And so sometimes just wording that like you're just gonna feel relaxed, you're present, you are aware of everything that I'm saying to you, you are in complete control the whole time. And really just reassuring them. And then, you know, if you're doing it and they still have resistance, sometimes that's where you need to use different modalities.
I know you're big into somatic, and I love somatic, and so many people are disconnected from their bodies without even realizing it. So sometimes, them getting into a state of relaxation, their bodies, like, No. Like, this is not safe. Like, we can't relax. We gotta run. We gotta, like, fight or flight. Like, we can't slow down.
And so, sometimes you need to do a little bit of pre work of, okay, doing some somatic or doing other release techniques, showing them that it's safe for you to slow down. It's safe for you to be in the present moment. It's safe for you to enter this rest and digest state. And working on that beforehand and then coming back to hypnosis, because it really depends on the person.
But if they don't feel safe slowing down and again, they might not even be aware of this. And this is where coaching comes in and that connection and knowing your clients. And then you can come back to hypnosis once they've learned and taught their body, like, hey, it's okay. Like, this is safe and we can do this.
And just kind of having those no pressure situations, like, if this doesn't work, that's fine. No big deal. Like there's so many other things that we can do. And that's why I love being a well-rounded coach, because as much as I love hypnosis, it is not the end all be all. We can do tapping. We can do somatic.
We can do meditation. Heck, we can do a dance party if you want. We can just sit there and talk the whole time. We can do a million different things because. every day is different. And some days you might not even have the energy or the mental capacity to do hypnosis. You might need to just talk it out or vent or you might need to do some tapping because that incorporates the body or some breath work.
And so that's why I think it's really important. to, you might specialize in something, but you need to have other things in your toolkit too. I agree. It's really a mix of things. Like there's not going to be like one modality that it's going to be the only thing that you ever use and like you're great for the rest of your life.
It's really like there's different situations that might call for, yeah, different modalities of coaching. With. Feeling safe in your body. This is a term that I don't think that people fully comprehend. Like, I know a lot of people have heard it, especially today with a lot of this, like, yeah, the more modern psychology talk that comes up.
How would you... Describe what it truly means to feel safe in your body and comparing it to a state where someone is not feeling safe in their body. That’s a really good question. And this is where self-awareness. It is huge, because I also think being open, because I think when we think safety, we tie it to danger.
And when we think danger, we think, like, my life is in danger. However, That's not necessarily how the brain works, which is wild, because after thousands of years, or however long humans have been on this planet, we have evolved so much, but that part of our brain has not, and so it takes danger as life or death Always.
There's no spectrum. There's no, oh, like, this is just, you know, a little uncomfortable, or like, oh my gosh, I'm gonna die. It takes, there is some sort of threat, I'm gonna die, I need to, like, run. Right? And so, in today's world, we are surrounded by stress. Right? We're surrounded by stress of always needing to be available, and technology, and deadlines, and this, and that, and this, and all of the different things, and although we consciously are aware, like, I'm safe sitting in my office right now, like, my dog is sitting at my feet, I'm safe, but my brain is like, but you have to do this, and you have to do this, and like, this is important, and if you don't do this, like, blah, blah, blah, and again, it's perceiving that as a threat.
And it's going back to, like, being chased by a bear. It doesn't understand, like, I'm not going to die if I don't send that email out today, right? And so, when we have all of these things, it's creating that level of threat in our body, and we don't feel safe. And so, tapping into your body, how's your posture?
Are you curled over? We tend to curl over because we naturally do that because we want to protect our vital organs. Right? Because we feel at threat. If you feel safe, your posture is going to be better. You're gonna be able to, like, stand up straight. How's your breathing? Are you breathing shallow into your chest?
Are you breathing deep into your belly and actually getting the oxygen that your body needs? Are you breathing fast? Are you breathing slow? Do you feel super jittery, like you can't sit still? Do you have difficulty sitting in silence and being alone with your thoughts? That was a tough one for me. That was a tough one for me, because I'm like, why do I always need to be busy?
And it's because I was avoiding sitting in silence. It was, I was avoiding being alone with myself, because even that didn't have a level of safety. I always had to be moving, because that level of moving is your body in fight or flight. If I'm moving, I'm fleeing. It's like completing that cycle, but if you're always doing that, you're never coming back to rest and digest.
Even tuning into your body, like, do you have trouble with, like, gut health? Do you struggle with depression? Do you struggle with anxiety? How, if you're someone who has a period, is your period awful? Like, do you have terrible cramps, and it's super long, and you break out, and you bloat? Like, we're told all of these things are normal, but common doesn't mean normal, right?
And so, all of these things that actually are symptoms and showing us, like, hey, something is going on inside of our bodies, like, the alert symbols are, like, Those warning signs are going off and we're just shoving them down and we're going through these days exhausted. We can't sleep. We're struggling, but it's so normalized now that we're just like, oh, I just need another cup of coffee versus having that safety in our body.
We're present in the moment. We're breathing, we're slowing down, we're standing, we're maybe taking time to do things. And this doesn't mean that we don't have stress in our lives. We're always going to have stress. People who promise you a stress-free life are lying to you. Stress is a normal part of life.
And yes, I said normal. But it's how do we navigate that stress. Are we getting absolutely consumed by it? Are we getting frozen in it? Or do we allow ourselves to move through it? Do we have the tools to feel the stress and move past it and let it go? Same with our emotions. Do we allow ourselves to feel?
We are human beings. We're not robots. We have all of these range of emotions because we're meant to feel them. We're supposed to get sad when our feelings are hurt. We're supposed to get angry. when something unfair happens. We're supposed to feel so much happiness and joy when we do things that fill our cup or we're around people that we love.
We're supposed to feel love, and we're supposed to feel deeply or else we wouldn't be given the capacity to do so. So, it's not about avoiding our emotions, which... We're so often taught to do, suck it up, you're fine, get over it, don't cry, you're being dramatic, you're just being sensitive. We're constantly told these things, and again, we're not allowing ourselves to feel or express, because now it doesn't feel safe to do so, because we were taught that it wasn't safe, right?
And so even just allowing yourself to be vulnerable and feel your emotions, shows that you have that level of safety within yourself, because you know it's okay. To be human, and I always say it's bringing back that humanness. So, knowing do I feel safe or unsafe is really about taking the time to slow down and tap into your body and being honest with yourself, which sometimes can be the hardest part.
But really just being honest and saying, how do I feel? And this is a practice because if you've been living on autopilot your whole life, someone tells you to tap into your body, you're like, I feel nothing. I don't know what they're talking about. And so, it's really about just keep going and really maybe try to focus on one thing at a time.
Focus on your breath. How am I breathing right now? Learn how to breathe into your belly. I literally had to learn how to breathe differently because I didn't realize how shallow I was always breathing. It's like, what do you mean breathe into your belly? You breathe into your lungs. That doesn't even make sense.
And then, you know, I learned how to belly breathe and was like, whoa. This feels good. Like, my body was like, thank you, finally. And that's why I think even just working with someone who can reflect back to you, like, hey, I, I can notice this is what's going on. How do you feel about that? And just having someone to talk through it with is really important because if you're new to this, you might not even.
Realize what's going on in your body. So, working with someone who's a professional and be like, hey, I noticed this is what's happening or how does this resonate? How does this feel? How, what comes up for you when I say this and really just being so patient and kind to yourself in the process. Yes, you said that all so perfectly, and I think a lot of people are going to hear that and really start to connect the dots, because you're right, a lot of people, because these things are so normalized, or pain is so...
normalized. People don't realize that it's something that you can actually change or take step towards or that this isn't your body's, like, this isn't what your body is supposed to be doing or feeling. Yeah, a lot of people don't know that they're actually experiencing this Like fight or flight mode because, again, they're just on autopilot all the time and they don't slow down and don't give themselves the opportunity to check in with the body and really even be able to notice what's happening.
I love having sessions with clients where we sit there and they're feeling all these emotions and they're just like, I can't really identify what the root of this emotion is like. And they're just kind of in that frazzled state and will pause and be like, okay, I'm going to have you close your eyes because I think kind of taking away some of these like different stimuli and senses, it allows you to pause because now it's like, okay, I'm going to close my eyes.
I'm not thinking about smelling anything, seeing anything, feeling anything other than connecting to what's within me. And I'll pause and say, like, okay, what are you feeling in the back of your head right now? And they're like, oh my gosh, I have a headache. And like, they didn't even know they had a headache until we just, like, actually stopped and had them check in.
And so, it's really, like you said, a practice of bringing awareness to the body. And as you, you know, you can go both ways. Like, you can talk about something and release something subconsciously, and then the headache will go away. Or, like you said earlier, there's other things, like, whether it's dance or, you know, even, like, self-massage, these things, you can manually release this tension, and then suddenly the emotion will come up to be processed.
And so, it's really amazing how our body is just so connected with the essence of ourselves. That connection is, yeah, typically denied for so long or we're just not really taught about that anywhere in our lifetime. And so to get people to start to see that and open up to that is really amazing to see the shifts that they can actually have once they're starting to pay attention to those things.
Yeah, totally. And that's where I think social media is so powerful because this information is out there for you. I have learned so much from Instagram. I'm like, if I'm on Instagram, I want to be learning. I want to be growing. And of course, it's the type of thing you don't know what you don't know. So, if you don't know what to be looking for, how are you supposed to find it?
And so, I think that's just where it's so powerful. The work that you're doing, the work that all of these people are doing on social media and putting these new perspectives out there. It's again, it kind of trickles. It's like one thing leads to another. And then all of a sudden, you're deep into this whole new world that you didn't know existed.
And you're like, wow, this is amazing. Like, I feel so empowered. because it's really about just taking your power back and coming home to yourself because if you have that feeling it's like That nagging feeling where you're like something about this just doesn't feel right, something isn't sitting well, like I know something could be different, but I don't, I can't quite put my finger on it, like I don't exactly know what it is.
Trust that feeling, like lean into that and just get curious and just start asking questions. And then it will be amazing what is presented to you when you're open to it. Ugh, what a beautiful way to finish off. Yeah, I know we could probably talk forever and we're already at an hour and I like didn't even feel that.
I know. Yeah, if people felt really inspired by hearing things that you said today where can they find you and connect with you more? Yeah, so I'm mostly on Instagram at thealiyaoneal. It's just my name, super creative. Yeah, that's really where I put all the goodness. And Instagram is where it's at.
That's awesome. And I know Allie and I were talking a little bit before this too. She has a special little gift for the listeners. We'll link that in the show notes, but do you want to give them a quick little idea of what they're going to experience? Yeah. So of course, Hypno is my jam. So I recorded a.
a hypnosis all about love for your body and appreciation and just really tapping into that gratitude for the temple that is your body because I am so passionate about that given my journey and also the work that Shanon is doing like she is revolutionizing the industry and I’m just so proud of everything
So, it's a hypnosis to even tap into that on a daily, a weekly, whenever you need it. So yeah. People are really going to love that. And I know I'm personally very excited to hear this too, so I can't wait. It's good. Not to, you know, brag, but I'm proud of it. Girl. To your own horn, you deserve it. Well, thank you so much for being on here.
I'm so excited to release this. I think it's going to resonate with a lot of people and really start to open them up to the possibilities and being able to see a future where they're healed and feeling better in their body and releasing things that were never theirs to carry. So, I love this. Thank you so much for having me.
I hope you love this conversation as much as I did. If you enjoyed it. Please take a screenshot and tag us both on Instagram or write a review for the podcast. It really helps spread the message and allow that ripple effect to happen to continue to allow healing to happen across the globe. Thanks so much for tuning in today.
Love you. Bye